she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
Hello Officers/Paramedics, judging by last night, my friend is dead. The money in his pockets is mine, he owed me. Please send me directions to whichever morgue/strip club for pick up.
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
Randomize
