Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
Randomize
