She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
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