i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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