let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
Randomize
