STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
Randomize
