If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
Randomize
