Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
Randomize
