she woke up with a sticky ear
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
Randomize
