i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
Randomize
