My dream in life is to scissor with Ellen. I don't care if I've got a dick. I'll make it work.
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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