Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
