If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
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