we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
First things first, I always get more drunk than the birthday girl. Like, who's idea was it to sing karaoke? I killed it.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
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