You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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