If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
At least be KIND OF sobering up before you text me, I've told you before I don't speak vodka unless I've been drinking it with you.
PS WHY wasn't I drinking it with you? Dick.
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