If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
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