I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
