ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
You've changed since you got that strap on
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Randomize
