Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
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