id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
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