I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
Hippo gnu deer
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
