I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
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