So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
Randomize
