lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
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