i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
She needs sedatives and a leash
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
Randomize
