have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
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