whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
Randomize
