He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
And my parents said I crawled through the house
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize
