He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
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