Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Randomize
