dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
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