And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize