I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
All I want is dick and wine.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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