Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize