Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Randomize
