am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
I accidentally broke up with him while I was drunk which is really too bad since I'd just gotten a birth control perscription so we could start having sex.
Do you think he'd take me back if I said "dude, we need to get back together or this IUD is going to have an existential crisis for not realizing its full potential"?
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
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Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
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I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology