Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
my mouth tastes like poor choices
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
Randomize
