I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
Randomize
