I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
My dick has a subreddit
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
