ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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