When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Randomize
