Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
I cant find my shoes, my wallet, or my keys, but i know where your sister is.
i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
well, you know. whores of a feather.
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Randomize
