Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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