Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
YAS. BRING CRAB.