Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
Randomize
