her vagine was all disorganized.
dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
I want you more than these girls want KFC
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize
