I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
These Dirty People Haven’t Told Their SO About Their Kinky Fetish
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
This is Why People Stop Sex Halfway Through
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.