it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
