I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Randomize
